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Home » Lifestyle » Entertainment

19 Fangtastic Vampire Puns

By Tyler Peterson | October 1, 2019 | Updated on August 30, 2021 | Leave a Comment
This post may contain affiliate links that we collect a share of sales from. Click here for more details.
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Halloween is almost here, and here some bad vampire puns to get you in the spooky mood. As opposed to the I-ate-too-much-Halloween-Candy-already mood. Three bags a day is fine, right?

Whether your favorite vampire is Dracula or that guy who glitters in the sunlight, we’ve got you covered.

Admittedly, it’s mostly in blood. Try Oxyclean?

And, if your blood type is pumpkin spice, we’ve got some PSL memes for you this way.

19 Funny Vampire Puns

1. This vampire snowman might get a chilly reception.
Vampire Puns - Frostbite Snowman

 

2. There’s a chance you will never ever ever ever get this joke.

Vampire Puns - Taylor Swift Bad Blood
Illustration by Justine Zwiebel

 

3. Only in LA.
Vampire Puns - Juice Diet Sign

 

4. Appropriate, considering Forever 21 has begun to join the ranks of the undead.

Vampire Puns - Forever 21
Illustration by Justine Zwiebel

 

5. Talk about a toxic work environment.
Vampire Puns - Coffin Break

 

6. Vampires love Blood Light, but only from longneck bottles.
Vampire Puns - Blood Light

 

7. Her nickname for him was Count Ricola.
Vampire Puns - Coffin Breath

 

8. Does he live near Freddy Krueger?
Vampire Puns - Dead End Street

 

9. Plus they never check their mirrors.
Vampire Puns - Drive You Batty

 

10. A Toto-ly awesome pun.
Vampire Puns - Toto Africa

 

11. Time to floss, Count Plaque-ula!
Bat Breath

 

12. Plus he always drinks too much.
Dracula Pain the in Neck

 

13. You’re so welcome. (Available here on Amazon)
Vampire Puns - Fang You Very Much

 

14. That’s one way to avoid heartburn.
Vampire Puns - Steak Sandwich

 
15. The day on the boat wasn’t all in vein.
Blood Stream

Need more terrible/great puns? Check out our Halloween Puns and Hashtags.

16. The TransAmVania was in the shop, I guess?
Vlad the Impala

 

17. We all feel a little drained sometimes.
Vampire Puns - I Suck Card

 

18. And we thought we only had to swap the silverware when dining with werewolves.
Buffet Slayer

19. Oh dear – this sounds grave.
Neck Romancers

 

Bela Lugosi

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Tyler Peterson
Tyler Peterson
Tyler is a writer and musician based in the Midwest. His work has appeared on Cracked, The Agony Booth, Robot Butt, and Points In Case. He enjoys music, pets, and fancy drinks. You can find him on Twitter at @dangercake666
Tyler Peterson
Latest posts by Tyler Peterson (see all)
  • 50 Valentine’s Day Hashtags Better Than a Box of Chocolates - January 3, 2020
  • 50 Funny Christmas Hashtags for Your Best Elfie - November 29, 2019
  • 17 Thanksgiving Puns Stuffed With Gourdness - November 12, 2019
As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. This post may contain affiliate links from Amazon and other sites that we collect a share of sales from.
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