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Home » Lifestyle

Your June Horoscopes!

By Sean Peecook | June 1, 2019 | Updated on July 10, 2024 | 1 Comment
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Funny Horoscopes Pin - June
Funny Horoscopes Pin - June

We love our funny horoscopes around here, so here’s another installment from our resident astrologist, Sean.

Here in LA, the grey clouds and chilly weather won’t quit so we didn’t realize it wasn’t February. (Also we haven’t left the house since March, so there’s that.) But, apparently, it’s June!

So get to the beach, and do all those things people do when it’s summer. Like drink eat ice cream sandwiches, charge your crystals, and travel the world. Er, well, not right now… but you know what we mean.

June Horoscopes 2019 - Khao Sok Thailand
She thought to herself quietly… “And this is what happens when you don’t ask for directions.”

Your June Horoscopes

Gemini
Passion and energy will take you by surprise, reminding you to take it easy on the cold brew next time.

Cancer
You want to feel happy for your friends, but you don’t know how many more Zoom weddings you can take. Cheers!

Leo
You’ve never felt more confident and in control than you do now, which is great, but you should probably let someone else have a turn at karaoke.

Virgo
Everything is aligned for you to be productive today. What’s that? Darren wants to get brunch? Make sure to wear a mask!

Libra
You finally find peace at work. Enjoy the severance package.

Scorpio
It’s time to check in with your goals. Time to let them down easy.

Sagittarius
Just know that you can’t control everything, but you should probably go catch your dog. He went right at the last intersection.

Capricorn
Remember that you can find love anywhere, even the Connecticut wilderness. Help is on its way.

Aquarius
Your search for meaning won’t arrive at any easy answers. Why did Game of Thrones have to end that way? Why?

Pisces
Resist the tendency to avoid conflict today. We know. You asked for oat milk and this is not oat milk.

Aries
You’ll feel confused and directionless. Try reloading Apple Maps.

Taurus
Not everything in life is a race, but this llama blocking your way to Target certainly is.

Funny Horoscopes Pin - June

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Sean Peecook
Sean Peecook
Sean Peecook is a tall and silly copywriter and comedian from Chicago, Illinois. See him on the stage at Second City, or at the theater watching the next Paddington movie alone. You can find him on Twitter at @notgreganymore.
Sean Peecook
Latest posts by Sean Peecook (see all)
  • Your Horoscope for December - December 1, 2019
  • Your July 2019 Horoscopes Are Here! - July 1, 2019
  • Your June Horoscopes! - June 1, 2019
As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. This post may contain affiliate links from Amazon and other sites that we collect a share of sales from.
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100 shares
100 shares